Miscellany 89

MISCELLANY 89

THE HISTORY OF

LITTLE GOODY TWO-SHOES

PART 4

 

C  H  A  P.   III.

 

Of the amazing Sagacity and Instincts of a little Dog.

Soon after this, a dreadful Accident happened in the School. It was on a Thursday Morning, I very well remember, when the Children having learned their Lessons soon, she had given them Leave to play, and they were all running about the School, and diverting themselves with the Birds and the Lamb; at this Time the Dog, all of a sudden, laid hold of his Mistress's Apron, and endeavoured to pull her out of the School. She was at first surprized, however, she followed him to see what he intended. No sooner had he led her into the Garden, but he ran back, and pulled out one of the Children in the same manner; upon which she ordered them all to leave the School immediately, and they had not been out five Minutes, before the Top of the House fell in. What a miraculous Deliverance was here! How gracious! How good was GOD Almighty, to save all these Children from Destruction, and to make Use of such an Instrument, as a little sagacious Animal to accomplish his Divine Will. I should have observed, that as soon as they were all in the Garden, the Dog came leaping round them to express his Joy, and when the House was fallen, laid himself down quietly by his Mistress.

Some of the Neighbours, who saw the School fall, and who were in great Pain for Margery and the little ones, soon spread the News through the Village, and all the Parents, terrified for their Children, came crowding in Abundance; they had, however, the Satisfaction to find them all safe, and upon their Knees, with their Mistress, giving GOD thanks for their happy Deliverance.

A D V I C E  from the M A N in the M O O N.

Jumper, Jumper, Jumper, what a pretty Dog he is, and how sensible? Had Mankind half the Sagacity of Jumper, they would guard against Accidents of this Sort, by having a public Survey, occasionally made of all the Houses in every Parish (especially of those, which are old and decayed) and not suffer them to remain in a crazy State, 'till they fall down on the Heads of the poor Inhabitants, and crush them to Death. Why, it was but Yesterday, that a whole House fell down in Grace-church-street, and another in Queen's-street, and an hundred more are to tumble, before this Time twelve Months; so Friends, take Care of yourselves, and tell the Legislature, they ought to take Care for you. How can you be so careless? Most of your Evils arise from Carelesness and Extravagance, and yet you excuse yourselves, and lay the Fault upon Fortune. Fortune is a Fool, and you are a Blockhead, if you put it in her Power to play Tricks with you.

        Yours,

                  The M A N in the M O O N.

You are not to wonder, my dear Reader, that this little Dog should have more Sense than you, or your Father, or your Grandfather.

Though GOD Almighty has made Man the Lord of the Creation, and endowed him with Reason, yet in many Respects, he has been altogether as bountiful to other Creatures of his forming. Some of the Senses of other Animals are more acute than ours, as we find by daily Experience. You know this little Bird, sweet Jug, Jug, Jug, 'tis a Nightingale. This little Creature, after she has entertained us with her Songs all the Spring, and bred up her little ones, flies into a foreign Country, and finds her Way over the Great Sea, without any of the Instruments and Helps which Men are obliged to make Use of for that Purpose. Was you as wise as the Nightingale, you might make all the Sailors happy, and have twenty thousand Pounds for teaching them the Longitude.

You would not think Ralph the Raven half so wise and so good as he is, though you see him here reading his book. Yet when the Prophet Elijah, was obliged to fly from Ahab King of Israel, and hide himself in a Cave, the Ravens, at the Command of GOD Almighty, fed him every Day, and preserved his Life.

And the Word of the Lord came unto Elijah, saying, Hide thyself by the Brook Cherith, that is before Jordan, and I have commanded the Ravens to feed thee there. And the Ravens brought him Bread and Flesh in the Morning, and Bread and Flesh in the Evening, and he drank of the Brook, Kings, B.I.C. 17.

And the pretty Pidgeon when the World was drowned, and he was confined with Noah in the Ark, was sent forth by him to see whether the Waters were abated, And he sent forth a Dove from him, to see if the Waters were abated from off the Face of the Ground. And the Dove came in to him in the Evening, and lo, in her Mouth was an Olive Leaf plucked off: So Noah knew that the Waters were abated from off the Earth. Gen. viii. 8. 11.

As these, and other Animals, are so sensible and kind to us, we ought to be tender and good to them, and not beat them about, and kill them, and take away their young ones, as many wicked Boys do. Does not the Horse and the Ass carry you and your burthens; don't the Ox plough your Ground, the Cow give you Milk, the Sheep cloath your Back, the Dog watch your House, the Goose find you in Quills to write with, the Hen bring Eggs for your Custards and Puddings, and the Cock call you up in the Morning, when you are lazy, and like to hurt yourselves by laying too long in Bed? If so, how can you be so cruel to them, and abuse GOD Almighty's good Creatures? Go, naughty Boy, go; be sorry for what you have done, and do so no more, that GOD Almighty may forgive you. Amen, say I, again and again. GOD will bless you, but not unless you are merciful and good.

The downfal of the School, was a great Misfortune to Mrs. Margery; for she not only lost all her Books, but was destitute of a Place to teach in; but Sir William Dove, being informed of this, ordered the House to be built at his own Expence, and 'till that could be done, Farmer Grove was so kind, as to let her have his large Hall to teach in.

The House built by Sir William, had a Statue erected over the Door of a Boy sliding on the Ice, and under it were these Lines, written by Mrs. Two-Shoes, and engraved at her Expence.

  On S I N.   A S I M I L E.

  As a poor Urchin on the Ice,
  When he has tumbl'd once or twice,
  With cautious Step, and trembling goes,
  The drop-stile Pendant on his Nose,
  And trudges on to seek the Shore,
  Resolv'd to trust the Ice no more:
  But meeting with a daring Mate,
  Who often us'd to slide and scate,
  Again is into Danger led,
  And falls again, and breaks his head.

  So Youth when first they're drawn to sin,
  And see the Danger they are in,
  Would gladly quit the thorney Way,
  And think it is unsafe to stay;
  But meeting with their wicked Train,
  Return with them to sin again:
  With them the Paths of Vice explore;
  With them are ruin'd ever more.

C  H  A  P.   IV.

 

What happened at Farmer Grove's; and how
she gratified him for the Use of his Room.

While at Mr. Grove's, which was in the Heart of the Village, she not only taught the Children in the Day Time, but the Farmer's Servants, and all the Neighbours, to read and write in the Evening; and it was a constant Practice before they went away, to make them all go to Prayers, and sing Psalms. By this Means, the People grew extremely regular, his Servants were always at Home, instead of being at the Ale-house, and he had more Work done than ever. This gave not only Mr. Grove, but all the Neighbours, an high Opinion of her good Sense and prudent Behaviour: And she was so much esteemed, that most of the Differences in the Parish were left to her Decision; and if a Man and Wife quarrelled (which sometimes happened in that Part of the Kingdom) both Parties certainly came to her for Advice. Every Body knows, that Martha Wilson was a passionate scolding Jade, and that John her husband, was a surly ill-tempered Fellow. These were one Day brought by the Neighbours for Margery to talk to them, when they fairly quarrelled before her, and were going to Blows; but she stepping between them, thus addressed the Husband; John, says she, you are a Man, and ought to have more Sense than to fly in a Passion, at every Word that is said amiss by your Wife; and Martha, says she, you ought to know your Duty better, than to say any Thing to aggravate your Husband's Resentment. These frequent Quarrels, arise from the Indulgence of your violent Passions; for I know, you both love one another, notwithstanding what has passed between you. Now, pray tell me John, and tell me Martha, when you have had a Quarrel the over Night, are you not both sorry for it the next Day? They both declared that they were: Why then, says she, I'll tell you how to prevent this for the future, if you will both promise to take my Advice. They both promised her. You know, says she, that a small Spark will set Fire to Tinder, and that Tinder properly placed will fire a House; an angry Word is with you as that Spark, for you are both as touchy as Tinder, and very often make your own House too hot to hold you. To prevent this, therefore, and to live happily for the future, you must solemnly agree, that if one speaks an angry Word, the other will not answer, 'till he or she has distinctly called over all the Letters in the Alphabet, and the other not reply, 'till he has told twenty; by this Means your Passions will be stifled, and Reason will have Time to take the Rule.

This is the best Recipe that was ever given for a married Couple to live in Peace: Though John and his Wife frequently attempted to quarrel afterwards, they never could get their Passions to any considerable Height, for there was something so droll in thus carrying on the Dispute, that before they got to the End of the Argument, they saw the Absurdity of it, laughed, kissed, and were Friends.

Just as Mrs. Margery had settled this Difference between John and his Wife, the Children (who had been sent out to play, while that Business was transacting) returned some in Tears, and others very disconsolate, for the Loss of a little Dormouse they were very fond of, and which was just dead. Mrs. Margery, who had the Art of moralizing and drawing Instructions from every Accident, took this Opportunity of reading them a Lecture on the Uncertainty of Life, and the Necessity of being always prepared for Death. You should get up in the Morning, says she, and to conduct yourselves, as if that Day was to be your last, and lie down at Night, as if you never expected to see this World any more. This may be done, says she, without abating of your Chearfulness, for you are not to consider Death as an Evil, but as a Convenience, as an useful Pilot, who is to convey you to a Place of greater Happiness: Therefore, play my dear Children, and be merry; but be innocent and good. The good Man sets Death at Defiance, for his Darts are only dreadful to the Wicked.

After this, she permitted the Children to bury the little Dormouse, and desired one of them to write his Epitaph, and here it is.

Epitaph on a D O R M O U S E, really
written by a little BOY.

                  I.

    In Paper Case,
    Hard by this Place,
  Dead a poor Dormouse lies;
    And soon or late,
    Summon'd by Fate,
  Each Prince, each Monarch dies.

                 II.

    Ye Sons of Verse,
    While I rehearse,
  Attend instructive Rhyme;
    No Sins had Dor,
    To answer for,
  Repent of yours in Time.

To be continued


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